How do I handle/cope with ragging?

Some background, some drama

Being ragged can make you feel helpless. Ragging can occur anywhere, even at home, colleges, schools, at the workplace, seven days a week, with potentially hundreds of people involved. For those who suffer ragging, the effects can be devastating, leaving you feeling hurt, humiliated, angry, depressed or even suicidal. But no type of ragging should ever be tolerated.

Do’s and Don’ts

No one wants to be ragged. No one should be ragged. However, it happens every day, to someone. Bullies, who rag feel insecure about themselves. The “How Do I" series tries to list down a few Do’s and don’ts to guide you to handle/cope with ragging.

Do’s

  • Ignore and not respond to minor teasing or name calling if you can avoid it. Sometimes bullies are encouraged by seeing a reaction.
  • Keep a record of the bullying messages, if any that you receive as hard evidence against the bully.
  • Reach out to your parents, friends, a teacher, school administrators, counsellors and even police officers who can help you deal with ragging. There is no reason to suffer ragging alone.
  • Stop all communication with the bully when possible.
  • When ridiculed, say nothing, and stare at them. If you don't fight, they can't win.
  • Remember that you do not deserve to be ragged. But you have to take action against it. Don't start a fight, but don't let the bullying continue.
  • The first time someone you don't know offends you, insults you or hits you, stop them before it gets bad. Stand up for yourself straight away.
  • If they make fun of you, do not change your habits. This will only show them they have power over you.
  • Report bullies to the administrator or a person with authority.
  • Report to a trusted adult. If you don't report incidents, the bully will often become more aggressive.
  • Report threats of harm and inappropriate sexual messages, if any to the police. The bully’s actions can be prosecuted by law.
  • Be relentless and keep reporting each and every ragging incident until it stops. There is no reason for you to ever put up with ragging.
  • Exercise, meditation, positive self-talk, muscle relaxation and breathing exercises are all good ways to manage the stress from ragging.
  • Spend time doing things you enjoy.
  • As parents, you can educate your child about ragging.
  • Have self-confidence.

Dont’s

  • Don’t sink to the bully’s level. Starting your own ragging campaign against the bully will get you nowhere, except for trouble.
  • Don’t believe the bully. Don’t let bullies destroy your self-esteem. No one deserves to be harassed.
  • Don't blame yourself. It is not your fault no matter what a bully says or does to harass you.
  • Don’t try to view ragging from a different perspective and make excuses for the bully. Don't give them the satisfaction of harassing you.
  • Don't make a ragging incident worse by dwelling on it. Instead, focus on positive experiences.
  • Do not attempt to throw comebacks unless you are incredibly adept. You will merely say something that they will use against you.
  • Do not do anything physical to the bully.
  • Don't do anything to make them mad and worsen the situation. Instead, walk away.
  • Don't let them ever bring you down. Make it look like you don't care because they just want to make themselves look better.

Last words

There are lots of reasons that young people rag others. Sometimes it's about trying to become popular, intimidate or make someone afraid of them. Sometimes it's a reaction to being ragged themselves or because they are jealous of the person they are ragging. It’s important to stand up and face the bully than to give in and lose your mental balance and peace of mind.

Sources and citations